Feb 28, 2010

Remember for Me

Remember for me because that is how you keep me alive.....
By Kerry Runyeon
Alzheimer's Reading Room


This evening Lily, Dan, and I attended the Dayton Contemporary Dance Company's (DCDC) winter concert which was fabulous. Prior to the performance we attended a reception for VIP season ticket holders. They had a nice spread of hor'deurves, dessert, and beverages. Lily remarked that she did not remember ever being treated like this at another dance event.

I replied, "Well this is their way of thanking the people who purchased their most expensive tickets." (which we do by the way to support our daughter who is in DCDC2)

Lily said, "I do that?" as she was sipping her coffee.

To which I replied kiddingly, "No, we do that. You are just along for the ride."

Lily, laughing, about spit out her coffee -- She has been doing that a lot lately!

One of the dance numbers had a voice recording going with a line that stuck in my head.

"When I die, remember me because that is how you will keep me alive."

My mind then jumped to:
"When my brain dies, remember me because that is how you will keep me alive."
which led to:
"When my brain dies, remind me because that is how you will keep me alive."
With Lily I might decide why bother bringing her to dances, shows, movies, events, cruises, etc. She won't remember, will she?

With Lily I might decide why bother dressing her nice, applying her make up, feeding her favorite foods. She won't remember whether I do or not or even why it matters, will she?

With Lily, I might forget to include her in conversation, encourage her to laugh, forget what she always enjoyed. She won't remember, will she?

Maybe not the way we suppose is right. However, inside somewhere in her core, deep down, I know she does. I believe she picks up on the feelings of those around her. We, her family, are her memory. We are the reminders to her life.  We are what keeps her alive. For without that she might as well be dead.

"Remember for me because that is how you keep me alive."

Kerry Runyeon, RN, BSN is the primary caregiver for her mother Lily. Kerry chooses to focus on the humorous aspects of her journey with Alzheimer's disease. Her blog Living in the Moment with Lilybird is a reflection of her experience. Kerry resides in Dayton, Ohio

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Original content Kerry Runyeon, the Alzheimer's Reading Room