Wednesday, May 5, 2010

Dotty Says, Pay Me in Money Not Linguine


I still think I deserve to get paid for all my work on this so called blog.....
By Dorothy DeMarco
Alzheimer's Reading Room


Bobby says, I am falling down on the job on this so called blog. He says, you are not writing enough.

I'm retired. I get to do what I want when I want.

Can you believe this? He says to me, for some reason you are sharp as a tack today. What does that mean? Does it mean I am dull as an unsharpened pencil most days? Kiss my ass Bobby.

Speaking of jobs. No paycheck.

Bobby says its nice and hot down here so he is going to take me to Vic and Angelo's for wings tomorrow. Let me tell you something. When your bones are as old as mine 90 degrees is not hot. It's just right.

As far as the wings go, he says that is my pay. Bobby is a cheapskate. He use to take me there and I didn't have to do any work. So I gave him a piece of my mind about it.

Then he says, OK, I'll take you to La Luna over in Boca Raton. La what?

I ask, is it any good? He tells me yes, you have been there a bunch of times and you love it. If I love it so much how come I don't have a clue what he is talking about.

Next he says, you pick the place. If its up to me there are two requirements: French fries and coffee. He then says, well we can get designer French fries at Angelo's and Vic, or a basket of French fries at the Banana boat. I'll take the basket.

He goes on to ask, I thought you loved linguine and white clam sauce? Who said anything about linguine and clam sauce? He says, La Luna. Here we go again. Bobby talking in code. I'll take the linguine in white clam sauce and COFFEE and a seven and seven while we are at it. Bobby is driving me crazy, I need a drink.

We have these big beautiful oleander trees right outside our door. Pink and white. Every time I look at them it is like seeing them for the first time. I wonder if this so called blog has a photographer? I would like to show you a picture of those trees. Otherwise you might get the impression that I am a bullshitter -- like Bobby.

You wanna know why Bobby says I am sharp as a tack today? For one thing he says my voice is nice and strong. And get this, he says I have not said I am hungry and starving all day. Well, I am hungry. But I don't know why.

I said to Bobby, I am hungry but I don't know why I should be, I haven't done a thing all day other then sit on my ass. Bobby says, there you go, that is what I mean. Here we go again Bobby speaking in code. I'll leave it for you to figure out.

Bobby says we have to go to the BOYZ today. I ask him if they have fries? He says, no. I'm not going.

Now he wants to know if I want to get Mexican for Cinco de Mayo today? Cinco my butto. Why is he trying to confuse me? We're not Mexican.

I have to go now. Bobby says it time for me to take my shower. I'll do anything he wants as long as I get some food. I'll humor him all he wants.

I still think I deserve to get paid for all my work on this so called blog. Money. Not in linguine. How's that for code?

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Dorothy DeMarco is a contributing writer and frequently portrayed character on the Alzheimer's Reading Room. Dotty resides in Delray Beach, FL. To read Dorothy's blog go here.


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Original content Dorothy DeMarco, the Alzheimer's Reading Room