Mar 28, 2014

People with Alzheimer's

People livng with Alzheimer's or dementia can be moody, distrustful, stubborn, aggressive, and withdrawn. Lets just say they become easily Discombobulated.

Bob DeMarco
Alzheimer's Reading Room

It is very difficult to understand people living with Alzheimer's and dementia. It is very hard to adjust to the way they think, feel and act.

Alzheimer's World

One reason it is so difficlt is because they change. Meanwhile we didn't change at all - do we?

Change is hard to accept on any level, and the dramatic change that comes with Alzheimer's disease is even harder to accept.

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What most of us normally do in caring for a person living with dementia is what we have always done. In the past this usually worked well.

So we try to be nice, we try to explain, and yes we even try to cajole. We do it in the way we always did, and

It doesn't work.

This happens because we continue to operate in the world

As We Know it, or Knew It

we become easily frustrated and sometimes angry.

The behaviors that come with a diagnosis of dementia are hard to understand and deal with. This can be explained by one simple fact. We continue to operate the way we always have. I call this place

Real World.

Meanwhile the person living with dementia has moved to a new place, I call that place

Alzheimer's World.

Where is Alzheimer's World? One giant step to the left. You take the step and ease right into this new place. Once in

You Join With the Person Living with Dementia.

In Alzheimer's World all the behaviors that drive you crazy in Real World become normal. They become easier and easier to accept.

This happens because your brain is no longer

Being Constrained by the Past.

Alzheimer's World becomes a brand new place, filled with brand new experiences. It is new. As a result the necessary changes become easier to do.

People with Alzheimer's do lots of things that just don't make any sense in Real World, and these behaviors will drive us crazy if

We Continue to Evaluate Those Behaviors from a Real World Perspective.

People with Alzheimer's often repeat themselves. If you read the comments section here in the Alzheimer's Reading Room you will find the newbies, the newly born Alzheimer's caregivers, complaining about this all the time. They do not yet understand that repeating is a normal behavior for a person living with dementia. They do not know what to do about it, so they vent and complain.

When Alzheimer's patients repeat themselves you can try redirection. See -

5 Ways to Redirect Someone With Alzheimer's

People with Alzheimer's can be moody, distrustful, stubborn, aggressive, and withdrawn. Lets just say they become easily


Discumbobulated : confused, upset, frustrated or disconcerted. This happens to all persons living with dementia, and it happens often even though we sometimes have no idea why it is happening if we use our Real World brain.

Guess what usually happens when we use our real world brain when dealing with a person living  with dementia?

We Become Discombobulated.

And then, anger, frustration, and confusion overwhelmes the caregiver and the person for whom they are caring.

It is a vicious cycle. But, I don't think I have to tell you that.

So what to do with people living with Alzheimer's.

First and foremost, when they become confused, distrutstful or challenging reverse field, reverse your mind set.  Meet those behaviors with an equal and opposite behavior. Try reassurance. See -

The Role of Reassurance in Dementia Care

When a person living with Alzheimer's becomes difficult and refuses to cooperate or do what you what like them to do, meet that behavior with an equal and opposite behavior. Become a guide. See -

New Year's Resolution - Be a Guide

First and foremost, throw off those Real World behaviors and communication techniques that just won't work.

Excessive explaining, and the use of persuasion just don't work. Forget the Blah Blah Blah. Learn how to communicate effectively with a person living with dementia. See -

Please consider reading the article I have linked into this article a few times. Give the information time to sink in.

Please consider sharing this information in support groups and via email to family and friends.

If you have the time share on Google+, Facebook, and Twitter, etc.

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Bob DeMarco
Bob DeMarco is the Founder of the Alzheimer's Reading Room (ARR). Bob is a recognized expert, writer, speaker, and influencer in the Alzheimer's and Dementia Community worldwide. The ARR Knowledge Base contains more than 4,600 articles, and 349,000 links on the Internet. Bob lives in Delray Beach, FL.
Original content Bob DeMarco, the Alzheimer's Reading Room