My husband of 56 years is glued to me, but frequently asks where Faith is. I don't know how to answer him without taking the risk of belittling him. I would love suggestions.I couldn't help but be moved by this comment and I decided to write to Faith right here.
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By Bob DeMarco
Alzheimer's Reading Room
It should be clear that Faith's husband is living with early Alzheimer's. So very difficult.
How difficult for her - that her husband is asking where she is - when she is standing right there.
Faith I wrote this article just for you. I hope some of our readers will reply to your request for "suggestions".
I wrote previously about the importance of touch -
As part of the article I wrote,
I smile at her, put my head against her forehead, and say something positive like,You might want to take the time to read the article. If you would like to see more about the importance of touch in dementia care please take a look at this custom search page - Touching.
"I am here, and I am not going anywhere". While my forehead is still attached to hers I add something like, "we are both here to take care of each other, we need each other".
I have also written about the importance of Reassurance in dementia care -
How much time have you spent thinking about the role of reassurance in dementia care? To read more about the role of reassuance and connectedness in dementia care please take a look at this custom search page - Reassurance.
Faith, you won't be belittling you husband in any way by offering reassurance. By connecting with him (touching) and reassuring him you will reduce any anxiety and confusion he might be feeling.
Faith, you are his connection to the world no matter what. I admire you for seeking suggestions and advice.
It isn't easy being one of us.
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Bob DeMarco is the Founder of the Alzheimer's Reading Room (ARR). Bob is a recognized expert, writer, speaker, and influencer in the Alzheimer's and Dementia Community worldwide. The Alzheimer's Reading Room contains more than 5,000. Bob lives in Delray Beach, FL.
- allegiance to duty or a person : loyalty
- fidelity to one's promises (2) : sincerity of intentions
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