Mar 11, 2016

Dotty Explains the Philosophy of NO, and Pinches 11 Bucks

Dotty then said, "you know when I say NO that doesn't mean anything, its just the easiest thing to say".

As soon as we neared the pool. Dotty started. I'm not going in the pool | Alzheimer's Reading Room

Imagine my eyes bulging right out my head, my ears standing at attention. It happened today.

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By Bob DeMarco
Alzheimer's Reading Room

Dotty, my sister Joanne, and I went over to the pool. When we arrived there was a big dark cloud out west and we heard some thunder. It was sunny at the pool. I said to my sister we better not go in.

Meanwhile, my sister had the opportunity to experience first thand the "NO" of it all. She listened on throughout the morning and early afternoon as Dotty said, No, I am not going to the pool. Me? I learned a long time ago that the word "NO" is Alzheimer's World in a tiny little word and has little meaning.

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As soon as we neared the pool. Dotty started. I'm not going in the pool. As we were trying to decide whether or not to go into the pool, Dotty continued to say, I am not going in the water.

On the way out Dotty wanted to know why we didn't go into the water. I said to her, because you said NO you weren't going into the water.

Dotty then said, "you know when I say NO that doesn't mean anything, its just the easiest thing to say". So there you go, right out of the mouth of an Alzheimer's sufferer.

I understand that the word "NO" often stops Alzheimer's caregivers dead in their tracks.

For the longest time now, Dotty has been saying over and over, NO I am not going to the pool. She says it when I hand her her bathing suit. As we move to the front door, on the way out the door, on the way to the car, and even as she gets into the car, Dotty says NO. Once out of the car, on the way in the gate, NO. Even when she has I foot in the water, she still says, NO, I am not going in.

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On a separate note. Early this morning Dotty was in my bedroom. This rarely happens these days because she can't make it that far on her own. However, when we have company she has to use that bathroom sometimes. I took Dotty to the bathroom and left. After a while I thought I better go check on her.

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There she stood. Rummaging through my money that was sitting on the bureau (I don't use a wallet). Sure enough she is stuffing a ten dollar bill and a one into her pocket.

I get her out in to the kitchen and then asked, what are you going to do with the $11? Dotty says, what $11? I say, look in your pocket. She pulls out the $11. Then says, where did this come from? I say, you took it off my bureau. Dotty says, I did not. I then asked, where did it come from? She says I don't know. Dotty then went on to say, I don't need your money. I said, where is your money? She says, none of your business.

Joanne and I had a good laugh. So did Dotty the philosopher and explain(er) of the word NO in Alzheimer's World.

Can't help but laugh. Good day today. Joanne has really perked Dotty up.

Bob DeMarco is the Founder of the Alzheimer's Reading Room and an Alzheimer's caregiver. The blog contains more than 5,000 articles for caregivers and dementia professionals. Bob lives in Delray Beach, FL.

Original content Bob DeMarco, the Alzheimer's Reading Room